The Aqua Suit

619-06198063

For those currently experiencing the intense summer heat here in Australia you will understand that once all your clothes have been removed, there is no additional possibility of any extra cooling. Once you are naked, you are indeed naked.

The only remaining temperature survival option available to you is to place yourself in a chilly pre-prepared air-conditioned room, or fully immerse yourself in the nearest available pool, river or ocean.

However, should you be the wise owner of an Aqua Suit, you will be impervious to the heat, humidity, and any hot climatic air currents that may permeate your vicinity.

The Aqua Suit is unlike any conventional suit that you have ever worn. Its uniqueness lies in the 10-centimetre water layer that is cleverly entrapped between the inner impervious fabric that is comfortably touching your skin, and the outer protective coating. To keep the water cooled, there is a nifty thermostat discretely positioned in the stylish waist belt that can be set to your desired temperature comfort. An inbuilt turbine quietly pumps the cooling water solution around every part of your body to ensure full thermal satisfaction.

No need to worry about embarrassing leaks when in public as the Aqua Suit is made from a tough flexible fabric that can be purchased in an array of fashionable cloth like appearances, so you will confidently look the part at any social engagement.

Is there any noise? Not really, only a small sloshing sound that could quite easily be assumed as your stomach gurgling post an impressive eating or drinking session.

Will I look a tad chubby in the Aqua Suit? Put it this way, once you have explained the cooling benefits you are experiencing, you will immediately be the envy of all your friends so any thoughts of overweight negativity will be quickly dispersed.

Where can you buy one? Any reputable swimming pool shop should be able to assist you with your enquiry. However, if by some strange reason they haven’t heard of the Aqua Suit, or if they give you a raised eyebrow look of surprise, then you can contact the author of this blog post who, for a small fee, will happily lead you in the appropriate direction of cooling fulfilment.

So don’t be hot this summer, just get your body into an Aqua Suit and, feel the cool.

Free your Hairs

Woman holding hair

I am indeed honoured to receive the 2015 Nobel Prize for Science!

I’m particularly pleased that my academic peers, and the international science community, have now finally accepted my many years of extensive research into hair receptivity and now recognise it as a credible scientific theory into innovative psychology.

Yes, we can now prove without a “reasonable” doubt that there is indeed a direct causal link between an individual’s hair and their ability to think creatively.

It appears that woman throughout the ages have inherently understood this little known fact which is exemplified by their willingness to have long, free flowing hair. Men, on the other hand, have considerably disadvantaged themselves creatively via an interest in having that clean shaven look (face and head), and their hair far too short. To exacerbate the male problem, those with a hairy chest, and those lucky enough to have a hairy back, have hidden their follicle prowess under garments (see the blog post titled “Membership in the League of Hairy Chested Men”) [1]. Age should also no longer be a reason for eliminating bushy eyebrows, hairs permeating in your ears and other less spoken about facial areas.

Thankfully, our proven research will now change this archaic hair behaviour for good.

This ground-breaking research indicates that the volume of hair, regardless of where it is located on the body, acts as a transmitter of creative thoughts, the more hair, the increased ability of the individual to think imaginatively. Yes, this theory does indeed explain the innovation behavioural problem evidenced in cyclists who shave their legs, and swimmers who like that total all over body nude look, specifically high platform divers.

For all you HR Managers reading this blog post, the key to creating a culture of innovation in the corporate office is for your employees to be encouraged to have long hair (both men and women) and for men to grow beards and moustaches. Now for those men fortunate enough to have a hairy chest, yes, the choice is obvious; all business shirts should have no buttons.

Yes, there is one casualty with this research and this relates to the activities of the hairdresser. Demand for haircuts will indeed decrease, yet hair styling will remain constant, so should you be thinking about a career in this field of employment, you have been warned.

In summary, be hairy and let your innovation grow to the fullest.

[1] https://thinkingfuturethoughts.wordpress.com/2015/03/30/membership-in-the-league-of-hairy-chested-men/

These Feet are on My Beach!

Miina

Old speedos and my faded blue seersucker shirt were not the appropriate choice of clothing for my daily 5 AM walk along the beach this morning. I was feeling decidedly cold, windblown and wet, but I wouldn’t have changed it for all the money in the world (well, maybe for $2M I could be swayed?). These magical moments alone on the beach were my time for quiet solitude where I could consider life, the universe, and those things really important to me (like what to have for breakfast?). However, this particular morning, I was not alone!

Yes, my private thoughtful beach sojourn had been violated by the presence of another person’s feet. I could see the evidence of their self-righteous, pompous, egocentric footprints in the sand! How dare they, I thought, this was my beach! After a few minutes my annoyance began to decline (mainly because I was freezing) and my mind started to ponder the identity of this mysterious and cheeky individual.

On looking at their footprints, I could determine that it was a slender foot, most likely that of an adult, but I couldn’t tell their age, sex, nor whether they might be an interesting person to engage with in a constructive dialogue. But, I needed to know why they were on my beach, at my sacred time in the morning, so I decided to follow the footprints and track them down. I was in luck as the waves had not erased the foot trail of evidence. I was on a mission now and my walking speed increased, particularly as I could just make out a figure in the distance wearing a red bathing costume and a bright matching red beanie. I started to run as I was now nearing the owner of those feet. However, as I was drawing significantly nearer, I immediately stopped as I thought I may have the appearance of a depraved minimalist fashion beach stalker and could be a tad frightening for those you didn’t know me. I was so close, yet so far from the origin of those footprints!

But then, the owner of the feet turned around, paused, sighted my beach attire and walked straight to me! I froze and the next thing I heard was “Good morning, great morning for a walk. Do you come here often? My name is Susan by the way.” For the next 30 minutes we got to know each other as we shared our common like for the beach and other topics of mutual interest (including breakfast).

I was so pleased that I had explored those footprints and not just blankly looked at them as I focused on my private walk of thought that morning. Unfortunately, we are often too absorbed in our own personal affairs to take the time to explore new events and unknown people around us. Sometimes, it takes effort, persistence and a lot of work to seek out these new experiences, but it will most definitively benefit you, and the other owners of the footprints you encounter.

Go on, give the exploration of “new feet” a go!

Dress for Success

Untitled

Perched with a seal like physique, and with toes just residing on the edge of the starting blocks, the swimmer’s ears desperately listens for the starters gun to allow their body to be catapulted into the pool.

Comment: Now this is probably the “verbage” one would expect to read when describing such an activity, but no, I will be observing the swimming race from an entirely different perspective.

If you were to study the appearance of the swimmers, you would witness them all to be wearing sleek, body hugging bathers, or they would be similarly equipped with a freshly shaven and ultra-smooth body brandishing the most microscopic swimming costume that just avoids an exhibitional “R-Rating” classification. Gone are the days of seeing a daggy, loose fitting, hairy chested (yes, I am talking about men), bawdy, bather clad swimmer who looked like they were preparing their large belly for the high gravitational impact of a maximised “bomb” splash. Yes, these people do still exist, but only in certain residential suburbs that you and I tend not to frequent (well, maybe not state publicly anyway?).

Those swimmers that have the objective of wanting to win, tend to “Dress For Success”.

The key word here is not “success”, but actually “dress” and no, I’m not saying that everyone needs to actually wear a dress to be successful. Rather, successful people have an individual fashion statement that captures the true essence of their personality and which defines their own distinctive uniqueness. In a similar way to the “Impressionist Master Painters”, their brush strokes and use of colour, created works of art that truly defined their signature, even if they didn’t actually sign the painting. People just needed to view the painting, upon which the artistic origin was immediately recognised.

The successful swimmer combines the requisite sports swimming costume with their own brand of style and technique when in the water. Similarly, powerful and influential people have their own fashion persona that identifies them with a tailored clothing statement via the selection of a range of accessories such as ties, shirts, suits, shoes, socks, cuff-links, aftershave, perfumes (I was thinking woman, but each to their own), hairstyles and suchlike, that when combined by them supports and reinforces their personal and publicly branded message.

So as that old phrase goes, “Clothes do indeed maketh the woman and the man”. If you want to look like a bogan, well, dress like one and you will be treated as per the appearance you portray. But if you want to look like a winner, then dress accordingly.

Now for those of you that wear a kilt, the verdict is indeed still out on this one! However, if you wear a bow-tie, no more needs to be said!

Business Basics: Beach, Balls, Bats and Bathers

A family plays beach cricket at Byron Bay

As you stroll along many Australian seaside beaches in summer you are bound to come across a group of people playing cricket on the sand. The official name for this game is “Beach Cricket”.

The customary uniform for Beach Cricket is typically minimal and encompasses a range of different coloured and sized speedos, bikinis, hats, sunglasses and the frequent application of sunblock. The rules will vary depending on beach locality and the skill set of the players, but for that optimum scoring opportunity, a large hit by the batsman into the sea normally provides the best result!

There is usually no participant exclusion to the game as with more people, the easier it is to play, particularly when fielding the ball on the soft hot sand in your bare feet. Those wanting to play do not need a formal invitation. The accepted custom is to simply walk up and ask “Can I join in and play?” The response is unquestionably “Yep, sure thing, just take a fielding position out in the sand, or sea”. I personally like the sea, as it provides the maximum opportunity for extreme laziness, body cooling and water flotation!

The game may last for hours, or until the ball is absconded by a passing dog frolicking on the sand, but the result is a great time for all.

If we look at the game of Beach Cricket from a corporate office perspective there are some important strategic learnings.

In Beach Cricket there are no exclusions, cliques or private groups that filter member participation. Each new player is welcomed regardless of whether their skill set is minimal or vastly experienced. So why not have this same employee involvement philosophy in business? Is it that we are too self conscious to join in, or too scared that we may “drop the ball”, or are we a little too selective about having the “right” people” in our work team?

As with Beach Cricket, when people feel welcome and valued regardless of their ability, they tend to enjoy the team spirit, the sense of belonging and throw themselves into the required objective (which occurs quite literally when fielding the ball on the sand and in the water) with an unrestricted level of enthusiasm. Many of the team participants may discover some hidden talents when provided with the opportunity “to play”, others may watch and learn from the more experienced and skilled members of the team, either way, the result is beneficial to all.

So next time your office work team starts to have that all too familiar “dysfunctional look”, may I suggest you grab a ball, a cricket bat and head for the beach! If your team is located in the cooler climates, you are allowed to swap the swimming bathers for some more suitable and warmer clothing attire, and if the ball is hit deliberately into the cold ocean water, may I suggest the cheeky batsman be ruled as out and they be asked to field the ball themselves!

Be a large Goldfish…not a small one

Gold Fish Bowl Jump 089/365 [explore #150]

It is said that a goldfish when placed in a fishbowl, or larger watery space, will grow to a size that is suitable for that particular swimming environment. The larger the amount of available water volume, the greater the opportunity for the goldfish to increase in size.

This got me thinking….

Many employees have worked for quite a while in the same job role where they have fully mastered their position and are now regarded as the expert within their business organization. In essence, they are the “goldfish in the fishbowl” where they have grown to their maximum size potential.

However, what if they were moved into a new role, or transferred into another business division, or leave and join another company? They would still have the experiences that they had established and fine-tuned in their previous role, but they would now have greater opportunity to expand their vision, skills and learnings in the next one. This would be like the small goldfish being placed into a much larger bowl where they could now grow into a more impressive and bigger fish.

The key is to not let your current fishbowl size limit your thinking and career potential, but to always looks for the many free flowing streams that will lead you to a larger and more impressive fishbowl or pond (or even an ocean) where you can swim freely and get bigger!

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