All posts tagged corporate

That Aurafication Advantage

Businesswoman consulting a partner

I’m sure that many of you have walked into a room full of people that you don’t know and can immediately sense the atmosphere that is prevalent, whether that be positive or negative. Sometimes it can be seen in their body language, or their tone of voice, or just the way they stare at you when you interrupt the mood with that look of bewilderment, or relief that someone new and interesting has joined the group. Either way, it doesn’t take you long to know whether you should continue to walk in, or just back out graciously and say with that sincere and genuine voice, “sorry for the interruption, I think I may have the wrong room” as you lie most professionally through your teeth!

Let’s call this room atmosphere the ‘meeting aura’ or just ‘aura’ for short.
You can also experience this aura when you visit a city for the first time. I’m based in Melbourne and many visitors state that there is a unique ‘Mel-aura’ that is quickly identifiable as you traverse the city streets, similarly Sydney has its own ‘Syd-aura’, as do many other cities around the world.

Many corporate organisations have their own brand that is quite distinctive and readily noticeable when you enter their head office, or meet an employee that is a true believer of their business culture. So, what is it that creates this aura, or ‘corporate aurafication’ that is so illusive to many organisations!

To me, the key to successful ‘aurafication’ is being prepared to be different, but different in a positive and constructive way that encourages employees to want to be linked to the organisation. If their participation in the business is beneficial to them personally, then the process of ‘aurafication’ is well and truly on the way. If there is no prospect for personal growth, then the chance of a successful ‘aurafication’ will be quickly nullified and the business will become yet another one of those boring, and unimpressive companies of which there are far too many!

So in order for your company to have that well sought after aura that many employees strive to obtain, focus on creating your own unique corporate culture and thereby obtain that optimum ‘aurafication’! It might just be the start of that competitive advantage that your business is looking for at the moment?

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by Steven Cramer on April 4, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on April 4, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/04/04/that-aurafication-advantage/

Office Stress Elimination

woman darkness

There is a dark room in the corporate office that is buried deep down in the depths of the building foundations. In this room sits a quiet unassuming gentle natured woman who has a perpetual smile continually permeating from her face.

Her body is an illuminated random visual blur of different coloured lights that are reflecting the constantly changing computer screen displays that cover every inch of her office walls. Her eyes dart from each computer screen on the look out for that bright red warning light to flash indicating that she needs to move into the appropriate corrective action routine that is stipulated for her to follow when prompted.

So what exactly does she do? Well, let me enlighten you.

Did you know that underneath each of your computer keyboards in the corporate office there is a microscopic sensor? This sensor has been finely calibrated to measure the finger force that you apply when using your computer. When you are stressed, or agitated, the sensor measures the corresponding minute change in your finger pressure from your usual benchmark ‘non-stressed value’ that has been determined over many hours of computer typing activity.

For those of you that are a tad stressed for a long duration whilst residing at your computer, this triggers a red flashing warning light on the woman’s console.

I will now explain this woman’s role in the corporate office. She is the Senior Director of Stress Elimination and reports directly to the Vice President of HR.

The flashing red light now prompts the well established smile on her face to quickly widen as she prepares the required corrective action to alleviate the user stress now identified on her computer console. She is now in her element and initiates all her years of stress reduction training.

She now types in the secretive stress reduction codes into her computer. Once the ‘enter’ key has been hit, a chain reaction of electrical interference is now implemented.

The stressed person sitting at their computer will suddenly be plunged into an eery silence . All the phones and computers of their surrounding work colleagues will be immediately shutdown. However, their computer will continue to operate without any hindrance. The stressed worker will now hear a loud flurry of annoyed and angry colleagues sitting next to them and they will consider that they are quite lucky in that they can still work without any interruption! Their sense of stress will now change to a feeling happiness!

I can now hear you ask about how the Senior Director of Stress Elimination now handles the commotion that she has now generated? Well, the answer is quite simple, she has a coffee break and leaves it to the corporate IT Help Desk to sort out!

Fifteen minutes later, when everything has now settled down, she returns quietly to her desk and awaits for her next stress relieving opportunity to assist a fellow work colleague….

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by Steven Cramer on April 1, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on April 1, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/04/01/office-stress-elimination/

Office Roller Skating Instructors

skates

Last night I experienced something that I hadn’t done for quite a long time….yes, I went roller skating! It was a successful encounter, mainly because I didn’t fall over and I remained vertical throughout the whole activity, apart from landing rather heavily on my bottom when I transitioned from the rink to the external carpeted area in the viewing area…but thankfully, I don’t think anyone noticed!

What was the secret to my success? My delightful and charming instructor who I must admit provided me with the confidence and inspiration to do it. The key was to not focus on the mechanics of the actual roller-skating activity, but rather to “get into the groove and rhythm” of the gliding encounter. Once I started to change my mindset and “let go of my inhibitions”, the whole experience became really quite enjoyable. However, I was brought down a peg or two in my perceived self-brilliance when my instructor whizzed past me at top speed backwards whilst balancing on one skate! Maybe I’ll try that in my second lesson? (Or is that my twenty-second lesson!!)

This got me thinking. When we are in the corporate office, how do we cope with those awkward and rather stressful situations? Most of us tend to focus on all the potential negatives that cause our inhibition levels to dramatically increase thereby impacting our ability to perform at the required level. For me with roller skating, prior to be entering the rink, I was thinking about the various injuries I might experience such as broken bones, pulled muscles, and my biggest concern being severe embarrassment!

One potential solution in the corporate office is to have an “instructor” that walks around the building offering support and advise to those in need? They may not want to be dressed like my roller skating instructor who was adorned in a rather short and impressive flappy skating skirt, but something more corporately appropriate would suffice. But they do need to have a personality that enlists confidence in those that they talk to so they can readily overcome their concerns, and to just be there to offer a “helping hand” when required.

So next time you are walking the corridors within your office with any self doubt, may I suggest you keep an eye out for any helpful “instructors” that may be “gracefully skating” past you! If you do see them, don’t be scared to shout out and seek some help and experience so you can perform with greater confidence and ability.

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by Steven Cramer on March 28, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on March 28, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/03/28/office-roller-skating-instructors/

Corporate Guide Illuminators

Car headlights

Recently I was driving at night on a rather windy and narrow road in the country. The region was quite desolate so there were no other cars to be seen, apart from the occasional animal leaping in front of my car’s headlights with a stunned suicidal look of fright and utter surprise, including me!

Navigating the dark road terrain took a large amount of concentration, particularly as I had no idea as to the width of the road on quite a few occasions. This resulted in me reducing my driving speed rather dramatically as I attempted to come to terms with the unfamiliar environment.

If I had been following a car the whole journey would have been much easier and far less stressful. In this situation, the other car’s headlights would have illuminated the road for me and I could have judged their trajectory by monitoring the red lights permeating from the back of their vehicle.

Let’s explore this analogy in the corporate office. On many occasions when starting a new job or task, we are left to our own devices from which we frequently learn via a process of trial and error. If we are unsure of the required process, we typically proceed with some degree of caution so as to minimize the likelihood of potential mistakes.

However, if we had a ‘corporate guide’ (or mentor) to assist us along our business journey we would progress with greater confidence and speed and arrive at the final objective (or destination) in a much more comfortable state of mind and improved productivity.

One option is to equip those people in the business classified as mentors with a red reflector on their backs and bottoms and a white lantern on their stomachs, just like with a car to provide direction for other employees, but somehow I can’t see this being accepted by the wearer?

A better, and maybe less attention seeking option is for the organization to take the time and effort to train mentors on how to work and encourage those employees who are deemed less knowledgeable on an activity prior to them embarking on the project or task.

However, I do quite like the idea of highlighting mentors with a large hat with a gold flashing light positioned on top to recognize their mentorship skills….but that’s just me.

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by Steven Cramer on March 27, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on March 27, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/03/27/corporate-guide-illuminators/

Vanilla Flavoured Diversity

My Primary Workhorse

Signed……Steven Cramer. The black ink that had just permeated from my treasured fountain pen was almost dry on my new employment contract. I gleefully looked once again at the document, and then with an eager and expectant smile on my face, I carefully folded the paper, placed it in the reply-paid envelope and put it aside ready to be posted to my new employer.

All of us have at some stage in our working careers have experienced the excitement associated with starting a job with a new corporate organization, or a new role within your existing company. Prior to us starting this new role, we have many ideas and thoughts on how and what we are going to achieve, we do not impose any limitations, nor do we expect the organization or our fellow colleagues to hamper any progress on the attainment of these objectives.

Unfortunately, many of us after a few years working for the same organization lose this positive and creative persona and slowly morph into a common and accepted form of corporate behaviour where any diversity of thought is progressively extinguished. The result is a “vanilla flavoured” corporate culture that is prevalent in many corporate company’s today.

But does this need to be the case?

A thought.
Why do we not ask all new employees to write down their career aspirations on what they would like to achieve prior to the first day of their employment? This untainted document could then be stored for a period of time (say 3-5 years) following which it is then opened and reread by the employee and discussed with a senior member of the management team. It would be interesting for the employee to see how their enthusiasm has been maintained or even increased over the time period, or has it been severely hindered? If the latter, then what has caused this negativity and how could the corporate culture be improved to encourage and foster a greater diversity of thought?

Many companies talk about the concept of diversity, but are quite content to operate in the “vanilla flavoured” business environment. When a new employee starts, they may be flavoured “strawberry, blueberry, or even have lumps of chocolate” diffusing through their personality. But after a period of time, this creative flavour may have been slowly purged and replaced with the approved corporate taste. If an organization truly values diversity, why focus on the attainment of the “vanilla”?

There are many great benefits to a company if their employees do think that little bit differently, particularly with respect to innovation which could be utilised in a variety of different areas such as new product development, improvements in service offering or potential business expansions outside the traditional norm? If all employees think the same way (“vanilla”), then opportunities for innovation and creativity will be severely restricted.

So next time you are about to start a new role, may I suggest that you capture your thoughts and aspirations and revisit them later in your working career. The rereading might be quite enlightening, particularly for you, and your organization?

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by Steven Cramer on March 23, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on March 23, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/03/23/vanilla-flavoured-diversity/

Cultural Transformation to a Tea!

Tea

I’m one of those tea drinkers that likes to have my tea in a long tall and transparent glass. There is something quite magical about observing the tealeaves gradually permeate their colour, taste and odour with the boiling clear water. With time, you will observe the tea colour swirling and leaving a distinctive trail in the water, with additional time, the tealeaves will transform the water into a uniform and translucent colour. The degree of tealeaf permeation, or transformation, can be controlled via the immersion duration time in the water.

Let’s take this analogy into the corporate office with respect to cultural transformation.

Many corporate cultures can be viewed like the glass of clear boiling water. To look externally at the glass, it is homogeneous, quite bland, and the only activity appears to be the vapour trail exuding from the top of the glass as a result of the high temperature (100C). However, unless something happens within the glass, the water will cool and the glass will reach a temperature that coincides with the surrounding room temperature. This is the boring corporate culture that is common in so many organizations today.

The key to cultural transformation is the introduction of a catalyst to initiate and drive change. However, prior to its introduction, the business management team need to identify and agree on what their unique and distinctive organizational culture needs to be? Let’s go back to the tea analogy. How will the business culture be defined? What will be its colour, taste, smell and intensity? How long will the process take to be achieved? What catalyst will be used to initiate and drive the cultural transformation? Will the employees, customers and the market like the final taste?

When tealeaves are added to the boiling water, the permeation can be accelerated via movement of the leaves, or the water itself via a stirring action. In other words, some action needs to occur to progress and maintain the transformation.

So when next you are considering the implementation of your next cultural transformation in your office, or if you are currently in the midst of one right now, may I suggest that you consider the following key elements:

1.A transparent glass enables your employees to see the degree of transformation permeation. Don’t hide the process, make it very visible.
2.Is the water hot? Is the corporate environment at the right temperature for the required cultural transformation?
3.What tea will be introduced into the water? What will be the catalyst that you will use to drive the change? What colour, taste, smell do you want to achieve that defines your corporate culture?
4.When should you introduce a spoon into the glass to stir things up a little? What stirring speed is optimum to achieve the desired effect?

Once the desired tea has been achieved, there is no point everyone just looking at it with admiration, make sure that all those involved in the transformation process drink the tea and provide management with feedback so the tea can be tweaked accordingly to maintain the optimum taste and enjoyment!

Don’t relax once you have obtained the targeted cultural transformation, as just like with tea, the organization’s tastes will change over time. Be prepared to continually experiment; maybe add some lemon, some honey, or another tea flavour to add that additional zest!

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by Steven Cramer on March 16, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on March 16, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/03/16/cultural-transformation-to-a-tea/

Corporate Access Code 76806864

I want to share a secret with you! But you need to promise not to tell anyone in your office! If you can’t abide with these T&Cs of confidentiality, then you need to stop reading this blog post right now.

For those of you that have agreed to the prescribed conditions, please move a little closer to your computer screen so I have your full and undivided attention.

OK, so what’s this all about you may ask? Now let me explain.

Have you ever noticed some people in your office that seem to do everything just right? They are the people who never seem to get stressed, always complete their work on time and tend to have the most innovative and creative ideas?
They are typically the career “high flyers” in the corporate organization and seem to exude a disturbingly youthful and ageless appearance.

So what is the secret to their success? Allow me to educate you accordingly.

Come with me on a walk in your office to a room that you may have never noticed. To do so, there needs to be no talking, pushing or shoving as we need to be quite stealthful in our journey. For additional noise reduction, please put these special socks on your feet, which come in two corporate colours – pink and blue. It doesn’t really matter which sock colour you select, and I won’t make any judgement should you choose one in particular! Now that we are all set, let’s proceed.

We are now standing outside a particular door that has a large combination keypad with which we need to provide a certain numeric combination. This code is only provided to those employees who are deemed suitable for this room entry privilege. Let’s enter the code 76806864. As I do so, the door quickly opens.

On entering the room, you will see some wooden chairs, desks, writing pads and an array of fountain pens filled with black ink. The room is completely white, quite cold and has no windows or paintings on the walls. You will notice that there are no electrical power outlets, no computers and more importantly, no noise. The only item adhered to the wall is a clock, but there are only numbers, no hour, minute or second hands, there is also no tick, apart from a warm yellow glow permeating from its circumference.

So what’s so special about this room you may ask? Well, in this room time “just stops”. Those entering the room do not age. Those people sitting at the work desks have quite literally an infinite amount of time to master and perfect any project they are working on. They can brainstorm and develop ideas that may take their fellow colleagues many lifetimes to progress, however in this room, they have all the time they require.

If you had access to this room, you too could be seen by your peers as a genius or a “high flyer”, the only limiting factor that you face is time, unlike those fortunate enough to have access to this secretive room.

So what are the learnings from our visit to this room?
1. Pink or Blue socks are quite comfortable compared to work shoes.
2. The access code is 76806864
3. This is the most important learning – Don’t let the concept of time limit your potential in your work career. You have unlimited time to do what you need to do and if you recognise and appreciate this fact, your stress will be reduced and your life will be rather more spiffy than it currently is at the moment.
4. And yes – unfortunately, this room does not exist in real life, but just imagine the possibilities if it actually did!
5. Just focus on items 1 and 3

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by Steven Cramer on February 15, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on February 15, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/02/15/corporate-access-code-76806864/

The Achievement of “Mobility Optimization”

Roads these days now cater for a variety of users, all with differing needs and requirements. To do this, many a driver will have observed the ever growing emergence of a number of specialist lanes segmenting the bitumen for motorised vehicles, cyclists, roller skaters, skateboarders, those wanting to travel slowly, and of course pedestrians. Each lane is typically branded with a painted logo and may even enjoy a unique colour and/or road texture to provide additional differentiation.

No longer do roads just exist for the humble automobile, they now facilitate the movement of a many a mode of transport. The result is what I will term “mobility optimization”.

There is another transport corridor which could benefit greatly from the use of “mobility optimization”, and that is in the corporate office.

Most offices have a maze of corridors that link employees between various work stations, meeting rooms, food lounges and of course those dead-end traffic zones known as photocopy rooms. People are all walking at different speeds, some dawdling along in deep thought, others perched up against a wall enjoying some social interchange creating a walking hazard for others, some carefully juggling a number of work items such as computers, folders and a steaming long black coffee cup that is poised for spillage, others just in a hurry to get out of the building!

The solution is obvious! The corporate office needs to establish transit lanes in the workplace corridors to facilitate “mobility optimization”.

For those people in a hurry, their corridor lane could be made from polished floorboards to assist fast walking, running or even the use of corporate approved roller skates (furnishing the company logo) for the achievement of optimum speed around the building.

The slow walking lane would consist of a thick shag pile carpet, together with the occasional table and chair on which a number of drinking glasses would be placed to support and maintain the reduced speed objective.

Like on a freeway, where car breakdown zones exist on the side of the road out of harms way, office corridors would be designed with “dialog zones” where employees could stop and socialise in small out of the way “bunker nooks” that do not hinder those co-workers that are on the move.

Surveillance speed cameras could be mounted above each corridor to ensure the correct use of each lane. Those employees observed not following the “terms and conditions” of their selected lane usage, would receive a “mobility optimization infringement notice” that would be E-mailed to their work computer. Those repeat infringement offenders, would feel the wrath of the corporate wandering wofters! (a wrath that most people do not want to experience!).

So, in order to eliminate your corporate office of all movement hindrance resulting in transport inefficiency, may I suggest that you initiate a program of “mobility optimization” and enjoy a much more pleasant and effective office environment!

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by Steven Cramer on February 1, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on February 1, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/02/01/the-achievement-of-mobility-optimization/

E-mail Innovation

E-mail in notes

Wandering surreptitiously with a nonchalant manner throughout the corporate corridors you will find a unique and highly valued employee. This person typically wears work attire that just doesn’t seem to “hang together”, may have a button out of place, odd socks, a belt buckle that is providing a little bit too much pressure around the waistline, and have that distant, rather sheepish look in their eyes.

If you decide to follow these employees, they will quickly lose you and you will wonder where they reside in the office.

Their names are typically Bill, Bob, Brad or Jen, Jill, Jan – their names are never too long, and one that doesn’t leave any chance of a lingering impression.

So what do these valued employees do? These people have a direct reporting line to the organizations Innovation Director and it is their job to continually bombard you with new ideas, even if they are unwelcome, nor appreciated throughout your working day.

These employees have a skill in crafting prose, together with an eye for various font and image selection that is constantly varied to be either particularly exciting, or to be the most dull and uninteresting. Their work rate output is considered to be one of the highest in the corporate office.

Yes, these unique employees are the originators of all your SPAM E-mails. They are the official corporate SPAMMERS and their job is to frequently interrupt your concentration with strange and subtle ideas to entice you into thinking that little bit differently. However, sometimes they can get a little bit too enthusiastic!

So next time you are on E-mail, don’t forget to have a look in your SPAM folder to marvel at the works of your fellow employees. Some of these E-mail masterpieces might just lead to some glimmer of a new innovation?

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by Steven Cramer on January 11, 2014  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on January 11, 2014

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2014/01/11/e-mail-innovation/

The Secret Wandering Wofter Xmas Tally

good

At 9:37 PM on the 24th December in all innovative corporate organizations, a dim yellow light can be seen permeating under the door of a room that is hidden to most employees. This room, one that is normally dormant and unregistered in the corporate room-booking directory, is on this occasion full of virtuous activity.

On sneaking into the room, you will see it jam-packed with all the “Wandering Wofters” who have a secret role in the corporate organization, that being to see which employees have been “good” and those who have been “naughty” throughout the year.

The “Wandering Wofters” will all be sitting at a large table eating mince tarts, shortbread, smoked salmon and copious quantities of fresh prawns which are all being swilled down with many large corporate flagons containing the company accredited beverage.

Each “Wofter” will have a complete list of employee names and they will systematically vote on each of their co-workers. Those employees who have been “exceptionally good” receive 3 votes, those who have been “relatively good” get 2 votes, those who have just turned up to the office and logged on to their computer get the mandatory 1 vote.

However, for those employees who have been naughty, look out! Those employees who have:

a) Participated in the office Kris Kringle without providing a present (-3 votes)
b) Attended the office Xmas party without wearing the customary party hat, didn’t dance or play in the games (-2 votes)
c)  Those that have had a perpetual look of boredom and doom on their face throughout the corporate year (-1 vote)

At the conclusion of the Wofter voting process, all the votes are counted and the “Grand Wandering Wofter” (a very esteemed Wofter role with secret corporate privileges) delivers the result to the CEO who now applies their corporate Xmas “spirit and cheer” that becomes effective at midnight.

Those employees with a positive voting outcome receive “certain benefits” in the following year that range from job promotion, improved seating position, better coffee, access to the CEO lunch left-overs, etc, the magnitude being linked to the number of positive votes obtained. Those with the negative votes may find themselves now sitting further away from the cafeteria, nearer the noisy air-conditioning vent or experience that their swipe card to the employee car park occasionally fails leading to many embarrassing honks from frustrated co-workers. For the employee with the most negative score, I would be scared to provide you with the specific details for fear of personal Wofter reprisal! Needless to say, this employee’s working life next year will be intolerable!

So when you are next considering how you should behave in the corporate office, be aware that a Wandering Wofter will be secretly studying your every move and will be quietly observing how your personality influences those around you from a working and an innovative perspective.

As a parting gesture, on behalf of all the Wondering Wofters that frequent your corporate office, may I wish you all a merry Xmas and a happy new year!

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by Steven Cramer on December 24, 2013  •  Permalink
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Posted by Steven Cramer on December 24, 2013

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2013/12/24/the-secret-wandering-wofter-xmas-tally/

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