All posts for the month January, 2026

Golf – I’m That Mischievous Hole

There is always at least one hole on a golf course that appears to have a mind of its own. It is the one that teases the unsuspecting golfer with unfettered hope, but then unmercifully demoralizes them with brutal savagery.

I am that hole.

You may think that a golf course is a placid, inanimate, terrain of grass, sand and water, with a variety of pleasant vegetation, some small, some large. You are very wrong.

We, the eighteen individual holes that when geographically aligned together become a ‘serpentual’ living organism that has one purpose in life, that being to mislead and surreptitiously annoy you, the golfer.

Our craft of subterfuge requires cunning, creativity and innovation where we continually change our layout on a daily basis to ensure ongoing golfer bamboozlement.

Of all the eighteen holes, I am the acknowledged master scoundrel of misery and frustration that relishes the opportunity to strike fear and trepidation into any golfer that treads upon my turf. I just despise the words ‘Par’, ‘Birdie’, but take personal reward on hearing ‘Bogey’, ‘Double or Triple Bogey’, and the greatest of all being ‘Lost Ball’.

The key to my success is my aptitude in being deviously canny and shrewd. Most golfers may experience the ‘occasional’ bad luck on my hole, but the following examples provide testament to my proven methodology.

Lost Ball: Every golfer hates to lose their ball, but in reality, this is not the case. Rather, I provide them with a temporary malady of blindness precisely at the location when they are nearing their ball. The ball is there, but they just don’t see it. Wonderful, isn’t it!

Wind Gusts: Should a golf ball appear to have that perfect trajectory, I have the ability to instantaneously whip up a superb, yet mysteriously powerful micro-wind gust that is excellent in providing the requisite negative ball deviation.

Trees: Once a golf ball enters the canopy domain of my trees, I ensure that the ball ricochets in the exact opposite direction of the green.

Sand Bunkers: I just love watching golfers digging holes. It gives me no end of entertainment!

Putting: This is the masterpiece of my creative ingenuity and one that brings me the greatest pleasure. Many a golfer has been distraught when their strategically planned putt circles the circumference of the cup, never to drop, but to come to rest a frustrating and miserable millimeter from the hole. How do I do this you may ask? Well, that’s my secret and I’m keeping it that way!

In summing up, or should I say when tallying all the above strokes together, some final words of discouragement for the golfing reader. I am a sneaky and mischievous entity that randomly moves from hole to hole based on how I’m feeling on any particular day. So, a word of caution, never assume that a tricky hole will be the same on each day that you play. I am out to cause you golfing mayhem, and I thoroughly enjoy it.

Leave a comment
by Steven Cramer on January 31, 2026  •  Permalink
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged , , , , , , ,

Posted by Steven Cramer on January 31, 2026

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2026/01/31/golf-im-that-mischievous-hole/

The Rockpool

As the mercury column in your thermometer quickly approaches 40 Celsius and beyond, for those of you fortunate enough to reside in an alpine region, and should you be adventurous, an innovative and most practical solution readily awaits.  

The solution is typically a well-guarded secret location only privy to a select few local residents who are in the know. Should any outsiders be invited to participate in and enjoy its delights, the signing of a confidentiality agreement prior to being granted access is typically the requisite norm. Afterall, no individuals of the riff-raff class are allowed, nor should they be.

The secret location is colloquially known as a ‘rockpool’.  It is a hidden gem that meanders majestically along the route of a mountain river where the water is cool, clean and refreshing to those that fully appreciate its invigorating benefits, particularly when the heat of the day is at its maximum.

Now there are some rules that any seeker of the rockpool needs to follow as there are positives and negatives to the cooling experience.

Clothing: This all depends on the isolation proximity of the rockpool and your, and any potential observers, acceptance of nudity. Some form of bathing attire is the most common sight; however, this criterion is best decided by the individual concerned, and their perceived level of risk.

Footwear: For those of you lucky enough to have neanderthal shaped feet, relax as you have nothing to worry about. But, if you don’t, then a pair of river shoes is recommended as the large array of smooth rocks at the bottom of the river are most slippery and will result in many a tumble.

Fauna: Yes, you are not the only individual that enjoys your chosen place of cooling. Many an animal also partakes in the rockpool’s virtues when you are not there to disturb them. As such, you should be prepared to see the random lump of animal dropping nonchalantly float past your face, or the occasional snake gliding on or below the water’s surface. If you do see it, relax, because nature is a beautiful thing to behold, regardless of how you may behold it.

Humans: This is the most threatening aspect of the rockpool as they can, and frequently do, spoil your quiet refreshing water solitude. This tends to be amplified should there be a tree swing where a bullish, loud and acrobatic individual may land next to you with a loud popping splash. The solution, cut it down when nobody is looking!

Sunburn: Even though the water may be cool as it expertly massages every part of your submerged body, those upper regions, typically your head and shoulders are perfect heat receptors. The result being a painful sunburn that will stay with you long after your rockpool dip.

Once you have mastered all of the above, you and those lucky friends of yours will be in an oasis heaven that only a few people get to enjoy. May you savor the moment, but don’t forget that “mum’s the word” regarding the location!

Leave a comment
by Steven Cramer on January 27, 2026  •  Permalink
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted by Steven Cramer on January 27, 2026

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2026/01/27/the-rockpool/

Those Pesky Weeds of Innovation

As CEO of a large, conservative company that has been in operation for over a century with little or no business growth, how do you know if you have those pesky weeds of innovation in your business? The following are some clues to help you quickly identify them before they can take root and grow.

Ideas: Should you hear an employee uttering the blasphemous words “I have an idea”, then they need to be dismissed immediately before that frightening innovation virus can contaminate your workforce.

Fashion: Luckily these recalcitrant employees are easily identifiable by their annoying clothes, colourful shirts, bow-ties and the occasional hat. Just ask HR to quietly usher them to the exit with minimal fuss.

Laughter: Fun in the office should definitely not be tolerated and should result in the employee being speedily placed on disciplinary action with the threat of instantaneous termination for a repeat offence.

Unauthorised Fonts: Yes, there are strict corporate guidelines that must be followed. Any employee daring to use any other font rather than the long standing and approved black Times New Roman needs to be quickly educated on the 100 year old corporate values that have served the company well, and are based on tradition.

Customers: Any customer having the nerve to complain about our products not meeting their requirements do not deserve the privilege of being supplied by us, after all, we know what’s best for their business. How dare they tell us otherwise!

Career: Any employee seeking clarification on their future within our business obviously does not appreciate the honour of working for us (or should I say for me).

My fellow CEOs, hopefully the above insights have provided you with sufficient information to nippily identify any annoying employees that might be creative, or have mad ambitions of creating a culture of innovation in your company. The key is to act swiftly before their offensive ideas can take hold and spread. God forbid!

Quod Erat Demonstrandum

Leave a comment
by Steven Cramer on January 20, 2026  •  Permalink
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted by Steven Cramer on January 20, 2026

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2026/01/20/those-pesky-weeds-of-innovation/

The Presidential Nose

This nose just keeps getting longer!

It’s now so large, that I need to stand at least 6 feet away from those that I’m talking to, otherwise my nose pierces them straight in the eye. But that’s OK, as most of my friends are one-eyed anyway.

Why it keeps growing, I have no idea, but after every media conference, Presidential directive and tweet that I post, an additional inch immediately appears? Funny, those colleagues in my political party, and those who work for me, all seem to have the similar malady? It’s not an issue, as I will tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me, me.

But a massive nose does have some advantages, particularly when playing golf. It’s like a second club that allows me to surreptitiously spike my ball and discreetly move it to a more favourable position on the fairway, or even on to the middle of the green. No one would notice, nor have the courage to say anything anyway, now would they?

Although the nickname President Pinocchio does have a certain pointedness to it, but after various unsuccessful impeachment trials, a criminal conviction, I am now back in my rightful position on top of The Hill. Thanks again to my political compatriots, great to know that our values are fully aligned, and yes, with time, you do get used to the nose growth, albeit a tad visually annoying at first.

Sleeping has always been an issue, particularly as I could never sleep straight in bed, regardless of how much I tried. But, with this whopper of a nose, sleeping is superb as I can’t roll off my back without shish kebabbing the mattress, or those in a dangerous close proximity, so it’s the perfect sleep aid for a man with my nasal stature.  

And of course, there is the complex issue of blowing my nose, but this I have resolved masterly with creative innovation. Most people when they sneeze, say “pardon me”. Not me, I just Pardon those that supported my dubious Presidential endeavours. The result seems to please them, and therefore me, and as the saying goes, its always good to have a subservient ‘handkerchief’ in your pocket when you are a President.

Well, that’s enough from me, for the time being until at least tomorrow.

Leave a comment
by Steven Cramer on January 19, 2026  •  Permalink
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged , , , , ,

Posted by Steven Cramer on January 19, 2026

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2026/01/19/the-presidential-nose/

Interview – Corporate Harlequin

Interviewer (I):
You have worked in the corporate environment for many years and were recently made redundant following an organizational restructure. As one of the best-known global Corporate Harlequins, what advice can you give to those that want to follow in your successful theatrical footsteps?

Corporate Harlequin (CH):
My corporate mentor, William Shakespeare, best summed up life in the corporate office with the following accurate words;
“All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts”.
The corporate office is indeed one big stage with many actors playing in different scenes that cover a lifetime of theatrical employment.

Interviewer (I):
So where does being a Harlequin fit into the corporate office?

Corporate Harlequin (CH):
I have mastered my trade over many years. I have worked with many impressive managers and colleagues, and unfortunately some less so. The key is to select the various traits of these individuals that you can craft and utilize as your own. You then consolidate these skills into a vibrant costume of many colours, each colour signifying your abilities, wit and business prowess for all the corporate world to see.

However, you must have a fundamental set of values that you abide and live by in your corporate acting career. This is where many Corporate Harlequins fail, are shamed and are eventually expelled from the stage with their career in tatters never to work again. An actor should never tolerate unethical performance. If you see it in a coworker, or a manager, call it out and push them off the stage, regardless of how important they may pretend to be.

Interviewer (I):
What’s the next Corporate Harlequin acting role for you?

Corporate Harlequin (CH):
I am proud of the many colours in my flamboyant Corporate Harlequin costume which eagerly hangs in my business wardrobe ready for the next scene in my working career.

As you know, I’m in a unique position compared to most Corporate Harlequins as I have the luxury to pick and choose the next corporate plays I want to be involved in. I do have a few auditions lined up and am confident that the right Corporate Harlequin role will match my experiences and skills.

Life is for acting, that’s why I’m a Corporate Harlequin, and very proud to be one.

Leave a comment
by Steven Cramer on January 13, 2026  •  Permalink
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted by Steven Cramer on January 13, 2026

https://thinkingfuturethoughts.com/2026/01/13/interview-corporate-harlequin/